He should accept you for who you naturally are


In my previous post I mentioned that I felt it was pitiful for a white lady to have been braiding her hair to keep the black man she was dating. Likewise, I find it equally pitiful when black women wear silky straight weaves to try to keep their non-black partners. Men should accept us for who we naturally are. We shouldn't have to change ourselves to keep them interested in us. If he sees you wearing your hair in a particular style it's fine for him to respectfully ask you to wear your hair in that style again. However, it's not ok for him to try to persuade you to hide your natural hair. This goes for black men as well as non-black men.

If your partner met you with a weave or wig, be prepared for him to be disappointed when he sees you with your natural hair. Weaves, wigs and long individual braids can change our look significantly and our partners may become attracted to us looking a particular way. Before you make the change advise your partner of your plans so he can be prepared. Tell him that you would like his support and that you would prefer for him to keep any negative comments to himself. It's one thing if our partners criticise our wigs and weaves, but criticising our natural God given hair can be hurtful.

Before making the big reveal it's advisable that you ensure that your self esteem is in tact. Remind yourself that God didn't make a mistake when He created you and that He loves every inch of you just the way He made you. More importantly, be sure to work on your inner beauty as well as your outward beauty. Patience is a wonderful virtue. If you learn how to be patient with people you will be more understanding when they make mistakes. It's also important for you to develop thick skin, that way you will be desensitised to any ignorant comments that come your way.

For any further advice you can contact me on Twitter or Instagram (@afroembrace).




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